Reflections on the Day…
Rehtaeh’s name was certainly heard by everyone in the Spring Garden Road area yesterday and all over social media. The beauty of social media. The sentencing has many upset at the outcome but we have to be grateful for the type of judge we had yesterday. His points and perspectives showed he truly understood the many layers of suffering Rehtaeh endured.He made his points that I hope hit an emotional chord for the male. Here are some of the points he made and he did “get” it. He said that every time that photo was shared Rehtaeh was victimized all over again. He stated that the photo was vile and degrading. That is was NOT a “trophy” moment. The judge asked the accused if it was the accused that walked in and saw his sister in that type of situation to ask himself how that would feel to him. We should not have to place it in that context for people to understand that we are all someone’s child/friend/sister cousin etc but sometimes context works.
The judge also acknowledged that the photo and the cascading affects took a vibrant young girl’s very essence away from her. He understood that and I was impressed at this foresight. He said that the out of “character” portion that the defense mentioned is not true because character is what we do when no one is watching. I disagreed that he acted in a moment of stupidity. If he was 11yrs old and took a photo and shared maybe..just maybe they dont have the foresight to understand the ramifications but at 17yrs old he did know that would ruin Rehtaeh emotional being on many levels.
I honestly will never know if what the judge said will impact the male or not but we can only pray something did. The judge was constrained in what he was able to do. When I ask myself what would justice look like for me to make this right? There is nothing that will bring my daughter back. I cant go back in time so what is justice? A jail cell? What would jail do to help the situation? We need to pray for that male that he becomes the type of person the judge hoped he would become. One that values women and feels remorse, one that moves on in his life to reflect his lessons. We dont need more angry males out there for another female to cross paths with and be assaulted. We need less.
There was no justice in the courtroom as there rarely is for youth crimes but that does not mean we can not rise up to make justice in our own communities by making it a safe place for victims of sexualized violence. Rehtaeh is doing that everyday. Justice does need to remove the publication ban because that MATTERS.When we say there was no justice we have to ask ourselves what does justice look like to you?